A terrible tragedy has occurred betwixt the Nutria infested swamps of Pocomoke City, Maryland.

Our dear friends, the Burkes, have had their large black cock stolen from their porch which fronts a busy street often utilized by local riffraff for passage.

The Burkes recently erected the hand fashioned cock on their sittin’ porch as part of their collection of large decorative roosters on a rotational display for the enjoyment of passersby.

Undoubtedly, some in the local community did not appreciate the prominently displayed cock or were jealous of their neighbor’s possession. 

Local resident and single mother Nunya Biznatch snapped, "Them bee-atches lost the council election and now they gonna stir up trouble like this? Sheeeiiiit…"

P-City Po-lice have been notified of the theft of the large black cock, but police officials are doubtful about its return to the rightful owners’ hands.

"A beautiful cock like this with its wooden detailed finery won’t do much clucking to help us find it. But the dirty handed thief should do the right thing and return the stolen cock," said Head Donut Deputy Harry Pusey.

*Update: The stolen cock was mistakenly described as wooden when in fact it is a ceramic cock. Our apologies.